Why is it that people say I should fall in love,
When I’ve barely learned how to stand up in trust?
I’m like the vault in the bottom floor of the biggest bank…
With a twenty four hour a day guard walking back and forth,
The gigantic, titanic lock and key..
maybe I just haven’t met the right iceberg yet,
Maybe I have and I was so afraid
That I ran the opposite way
Or maybe I don’t want to sink, or fall,
Or whatever the hell people do when
they lose control of their own heart…
I’ll sit there pounding on my own heart,
Turning the key, screaming “Start, start!”
But like any other rusty engine that defies it’s engineer,
It coughs up a cloud of dust
That could make people think a bomb just appeared
In the middle of a desert,
maybe I should change my name to Sahara…
But even out there,
There should be an oasis,
But if there is, it’s not where I feel safest.
Because where there’s water,
There will be a hand to hold you under
Until you stammer and stutter,
And declare your sanity,
Even when you’ve just lost it.
Maybe I’ve caught it.
The disease, or the cure,
Because I’m never quite sure
Which one people are talking about
When they scream at their partner
Who slams the door in the face of the shout
And after 20 years they’re still strangers
In their own house.
But still, I love love.
And I will open up my heart
Even when people crawl inside and chip away
With a hammer and blade.
And I will give love,
Not as a reward, but as gift..
Because if I wait for you to earn it,
I’ll selling the only thing I still hold dear.